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Revamping the Justice System |
Satire by |
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January 2013 | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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Watching the other day Secretary of State Hillary Clinton's "testimony" before the Senate and the House on the Benghazi consulate attack of 11 September 2012, it dawned on me: what this country needs is a major overhaul of the judicial system. The "Honorable" Mrs. Clinton paved the way for an entirely new way of dealing with crime and punishment. Here's how it works. If you do something wrong, you say these words: "I accept full responsibility." And voila! Justice is served! No need for pesky trials! You can assemble a room of people who love you, and just say: "I accept responsibility" and boom, done. No need for jails, no need for juries of peers, no need for any of that silly stuff. Those words, in themselves, provide absolution, and when those present nod sagely and with full compassion, well, we can all move on then, can't we? Because what is responsibility in the 21st Century, anyway? Just a word, spoken in minor annoyance. In the olden days, the notion of responsibility took with it some consequences. "I take full responsibility" was the phrase spoken before resigning, or being fired, or accepting that the words were not sufficient. But today, in the world defined by liberals, where, as Evan Sayet says, the "coin of the realm" is words rather than deeds, emotions rather than thoughts, then these words, spoken in a heartfelt manner, are sufficient penance, and bring all the absolution one might want or need. And indeed, to expect more is seen as downright wrong, cruel, and a personal attack. Guilt? Innocence? Meaningless. We are all victims here, and it's about time we just accept it. So we can totally revamp the "Justice System" for the 21st Century this way. I propose a new television channel, cable of course, funded by some "stimulus" money, with online streaming as well, that would be called "THE RESPONSIBILITY CHANNEL". f you were found to have done something against the law — dealing drugs, driving drunk, not paying your rent, killing somebody, breaking into a store, any of those things — you would be assigned a day that you had to "testify." You'd have to show up at a local studio where there would be a live audience; someone would first praise you, then ask you sympathetically a few questions. Then you'd repeat these words: "I take full responsibility." Tissues would be handed out for those so moved by your contrition, you'd say what you planned to do later that day, everyone would applaud, then move on to the next apologizer. Think of the money we'd save! The only question is: What will Attorney General Eric Holder do? Well, probably pretty much the same thing he does now.
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She is the founder of |
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